and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
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