It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
