i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
