roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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