You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize
