Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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