He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
