So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
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