You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Randomize
