Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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