no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
