You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
