So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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