Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
