How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
