I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
We talked him into tasing himself.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
