you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Holy shit dude........stairs
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
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