Ambien. No doubt about it.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I forget how to act sober
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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