I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
