He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize