Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
