She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
