i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
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