how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
