I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
