they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
i dont even know how to be here
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
where are my eyebrows?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
