I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
