Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
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