We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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