So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
