new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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