I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize