I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
