I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize