she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize