she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
