You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Randomize
