Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
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