Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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