Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
