Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Damn victory sex feels great
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