Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
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