Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
ugly people sure do ruin things
if i died would you start the facebook group?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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