I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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