he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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