You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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