yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Randomize
