hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
im holly from the hills drunk
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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