Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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