Define "chronic" masturbator.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
The air was thick with penises
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
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